How are you doing?

Published on Aug 09, 2022 by Matt Bud, The FENG
Being Out of Work Human Interactions

One of the hardest things to do during a job search or even during a difficult time at work is keeping yourself energized and positive. Here again is another example of how our basic honesty as financial folks gets in the way of our success.

If you ask a financial guy how he is doing, you typically will get an honest (and very long) answer. It is just in the nature of who we are that the structure of most of our answers follows that “primarily due to, partially offset by” approach to life that is just who we are.

I think what we don’t consider as frequently as we should is the impact this analytical approach to life has on others. Our cold analytical response to most questions indicates to those around us that we are not in a positive mood. (We may actually be in a good mood, but they will never know it.) Therefore, they don’t want to have a lot to do with us because we might drain their energy.

One of the sales training classes I took when I worked for The Thomson Corporation was run by Tom Hopkins, a recognized expert in sales training matters. When asked how you are doing the correct answer is “unbelievable!”

Can you feel the energy in this kind of response? It sounds so positive. Gosh, things must really be good! In actual fact, and in keeping with our need for honesty, you may have just had the worst day or morning in many weeks. Unbelievable is still a valid response for this situation as well. Still, no one will realize that this is why you said “unbelievable.”

Now, think about the difference if you provide a positive response instead of a negative sounding response. Instead of backing off from you, folks will draw closer. They will want to hear more about what you are up to. Their positive reaction to your comment will energize you. Strange isn’t it how one positive statement can build on another? But it’s true!

Try it tomorrow. Instead of falling into your critical assessment mode when someone calls and asks you how you are doing, say “unbelievable” and wait for the reaction. Actually you will probably feel moved to think of something positive to say about your activities over the past few days. Hey, not one person hung up on me this week! My computer has kept working! My car started this morning! The dog didn’t bite me when I came home last night!

Sure these are small victories, but by focusing on them instead of the presumed failures you might be feeling, you will be finding yourself feeling more positive. And, if you are feeling more positive you will project that winning feeling to those around you.

Everyone loves a winner, and you are one! After all, you belong to the best networking group for financial executives in the entire world!

As everyone knows The FENG is UNBELIEVABLE! (See how it works?)

Regards, Matt